I am the eternally single friend. I look around and see everyone in seemingly happy relationships and always feel like I am constantly exposed to public displays of affection between people around campus.
I joke about being “forever alone” on a daily basis when my friends tell me about dates they’ve been on or the new guy they matched with on Bumble. February is centered around Valentine’s Day and while I’m not in a serious relationship at the moment, I don’t feel like this month should be spent moping around. I’m spending my February celebrating the love I have for myself.
It can seem a little overplayed lately, the concept of self-love. You see posts on social media talking about not needing anyone else and appreciating who you are before loving another person. But just because you see it everywhere, that doesn’t make it any less true.
I have a marquee lightbox in my dorm that I changed to say “Love yourself” as a reminder every morning this month. I really focus on thinking of things I personally love about myself, whether that be my creativity or the fact that I give my whole heart to the people in my life whom I love. You shouldn’t have to hear it come from someone else’s mouth for you to believe it. At the end of the day, it all comes down to how you see yourself. Everyone else should not be the validating factor in your happiness.
Society has a way of making us feel as though we are nobody without somebody. The media advertises happy couples all the time, whether that be in movies, on television or even on social media. I am constantly scrolling through my feed and seeing posts about anniversaries and this month, particularly tomorrow, I’m sure I’ll see pictures of presents or dinner dates. You walk into stores and see companies capitalizing on giant teddy bears and boxes of chocolates that people always wish for. I know I’ve definitely been envious of the people who are lucky enough to be spoiled by someone. But who’s to say we can’t spoil ourselves?
As a single person, I’m happy to say that I still love the month of February. I use it as an excuse to spoil myself, though you should really be doing that every month of the year. I pamper myself with a face mask and a movie on the days when I need it most. I won’t hesitate to buy myself a smoothie in Plangere if I’m really craving it that day. The day after Valentine’s Day, I’ll even buy myself that discounted box of chocolate I’ve been eyeing up. These little acts of kindness are what self-love is all about.
I enjoy sharing this holiday with other people, too. I celebrate with my friends, whether they’re single or not. My roommate bought us all little single serve bottles of pink moscato last year (don’t worry we were all of age) and wrote us funny Valentines. Growing up, my parents have bought me chocolates for Valentine’s Day. It’s just a cute little token of appreciation that I’ve always looked forward to. My step dad even bought me a rose one year to match my mom’s bouquet that he got her.
Love should never be defined by a romantic partner. Loving yourself, your friends and your family this Valentine’s Day is enough. Don’t let anyone make you believe otherwise.
IMAGE COURTESY of Samantha Rivas
