An Opinion on How Hook Up Culture May Hinder the Dating Process
An Opinion on How Hook Up Culture May Hinder the Dating Process
He was a boy. She was a girl. Can I make it anymore obvious? All Avril Lavigne references aside, what happens next? For college student these days, we all know what happens.
They hang out, “Netflix and chill,” and things happen. And then they never speak to each other again. Or, they continue to “Netflix and chill” and do so until someone wants more.
This, my fellow students, is called hookup culture, and it’s happening around all types of colleges and universities. Coming from someone who has been to two different universities in a small matter of time, I can tell you hookup culture is big anywhere you go. It makes sense, though – we’re only in college for four years and this is the best time of our life – so we shouldn’t commit to anything serious, right?
Wrong. Hookup culture is destroying the way traditional dating has shaped us socially.
How many can say their parents met in college or high school? With hookup culture at an all time high, it’s likely that this may never happen or happen less than in our parents days.
Additionally, the idea of courting is completely lost on us. It’s much easier and convenient now to begin dating after months of hooking up, however the idea that a woman or a man should be taken out on a date or the idea of going on dates a few times before making things official is completely lost on us.
Perhaps, it’s good to raise the idea that dating sites making it easier than ever to avoid this idea of actually dating. Apps like Tinder can match you with someone nearby for a hookup, and it’s easy and simple.
Some people don’t like the idea of the drama that comes from a relationship. While that’s all fine and good, hooking up with someone provides even more complications. Since it’s “just a hookup” there are no expectations so it should be easy – but not if jealousy or ill will have anything to do with it.
I’d like to propose the idea of bringing courting back – even though it may be a lot to ask.
Is chivalry dead? Perhaps not. What if we didn’t accept the hookup culture? What if we, as a college community, raised our standards and norms? Instead of just aiming to hookup with someone we like, maybe we should ask them out?
Our social norms are changing. What we’ve been taught in movies and TV is that the guy will take the girl on the date and that they’ll live happily ever after… but nobody actually talks about the reality, or what happens in a college setting.
The point I’m trying to make here, is: is chivalry dead? Not if we have something to say about it. Courting in college can also be a process, but if we lower our standards to “Netflix and chill,” then the hookup culture will go on strong.
IMAGE TAKEN from elizabethdherman.com
