Last Christmas

Last Christmas Lacks Any Heart

Last Friday I gave cinema my money and the very next two hours, they gave it away. This weekend, to save you from tears, I’ll give you a review on Last Christmas, because you’re someone special.

In Last Christmas we follow  Kate, played by Amelia Clark, who works at a Christmas store and whose life is spiraling down the chimney. She avoids going home, underperforms at work, and doesn’t enjoy Christmas. Oh my!

That is until a mysterious man, Tom, played by Henry Golding, appears in her life and reminds her of all the things she takes for granted.

Yes, it was no surprise that a movie inspired by one of the most overplayed and annoying songs, ‘Last Christmas’ by Wham!, turned out to be just as enjoyable as the song.

One of the reasons why Last Christmas feels like receiving a bag of coal is for its by-the-stockings story.Kate, who has a lot of problems in her life, tries to turn it around. How do you think a Christmas movie like that pans out? It’s like when your parents hint at what you want for Christmas, then you find a sealed copy of Carly Rae Jepsen’s hit new album Dedicated under the tree. Yeah, pretty predictable.

Another is for its weird feeling of being both a Christmas movie and George Michael tribute. For example, as Kate walks around London during Christmas, songs like Michael’s ‘Faith’ and ‘Heal the Pain’ play. Then there are instances where songs like ‘Deck the Halls’ and ‘Jingle Bells’ blare. Movie, what do you want to be?!

The bow on top of this mess is the lack of laughs. Throughout, I couldn’t crack a single smile at some of the stale Christmas cookie jokes. A mom making jokes on a man’s candy cane? Not too funny.

If a Christmas movie can’t even make you smile, you should jingle all away from this one.

IMAGE TAKEN from Polygon